Mobile Command Center (Backpack)

Stack: I don't know how you don't live like this

spilled coffee (hot coffee) (black coffee) on my shirt five minutes before the talk (kink talk) (slutcon) other guy was sick (couldn’t do it) and I had to step in (emergency replacement) white shirt (no undershirt) coffee on it (warm) (wet on my skin) very noticeable (like I shit the front of my shirt) didn’t have time (talk in five minutes) last minute talk (kink scene talk) and the coffee spilled (black coffee) on the white shirt.

but in my backpack ($20 backpack) I carry everything (neurotic backups) electronics chargers spare shirts socks underwear laptop toothbrush (whole toiletries bag) and stickers for pranking (banana scorpion) (all in my bag) so I borrowed somebody’s suit jacket (great guy) and changed to my backup shirt (black shirt) and it all looked

good enough.

2. Pack like Batman

When I wake up, I roll out of bed directly into my pants. It’s not quite a Wallace and Gromit sketch but it’s close. My pants are locked-and-loaded ahead of time with wallet keys belt money clip; all I do is slide the phone into pocket. Quadruple tap to verify everything is in place. Each item is always situated in its corresponding appropriate corner and if any one of them is gone I feel it like a missing tooth.

I try to live pretty minimalist. I basically live out of a suitcase even at home, and any clothes I own which are not in the two-week rotation (the pile) are immediately forgotten about. If I tried to do it in other way I think I would be nonfunctional and/or die.

But I also have a whole…batman utility belt worth of other things, in the backpack I usually have with me. It’s pretty unobtrusive.

The Stack:

-Backpack

(Did you know that it’s actually socially acceptable to carry spare deodorant and sunblock with you everywhere you go?)

-Sunblock

This is the only kind of sunblock I can tolerate. I tried the zincmaxxing regular kind, which is persistently greasy on the hands and makes my autistic ass writhe, I tried the mineral sunscreen kind, which was a convenient way to just-the-tip myself into wearing makeup everywhere but didn’t work to block the sun, and then I discovered the cream and it has been adequate.

-Speed Stick

You can just carry spare deodorant with you everywhere. It’s called speed stick; it’s not expensive.

-Chargers

And why not just carry a couple omnipurpose chargers with you, too? I don’t have to “pack” for trips because my bag always contains some spare clothes and enough spare chargers. Everyone is always forgetting theirs and you get to be heroic.

-Clothes

And, clothes! I won’t link to clothes because you mostly know what clothes look like, I assume. But they come in handy when you spill coffee (black coffee) on your shirt (white shirt) right before you give a presentation about bringing Design Thinking To The Bedroom (elevating your kink scene crafting with DSchool product design loop)

Then

-Good Headphones

-Cheapo airplane headphones, for sharing

-Vitamin D

-Zinc

-Antibiotic ointment

-Dice bag (for all the pickup dnd games)

-Drugs

-Yarn clown

-Pile of pens

-Roll of electrical tape

-Measuring tape (which fits really gratifyingly inside the electrical tape roll)

-Various infrequently-used cards which are only relevant quarterly (e.g. airport lounge card)

-Insurance card

-Gum